I decided the other day that I would much rather feel sick than feel doped up.

I took Benadryl all day Sunday and part of the day Monday, and the feeling it gave me was absolutely horrid! I can't stand an altered state of being, regardless of what causes it. Yes, even caffeine can fall into this category.

I admit, I'm a heavy drinker of carbonated beverages, specifically Dr. Pepper, but let me tell you something:

I can and have gone weeks without the stuff. I drink it because 1) I like the flavor, and 2) I like the fizz of carbonated drinks. If I could find Caffeine-Free Dr. Pepper in 1-Liter bottles around here (1-Liters have a different taste than any other packaging and I like that taste the best), I would glady drink it instead of the "leaded" stuff. Water is good in the summer time when it's really hot and humid outside, but Dr. Pepper is my favorite the rest of the time.

Now that I have established that point, I will stop drinking Dr. Pepper if I get even a slight "buzz" from it. I've had a full-blown caffeine buzz only once in my life, and it is not something I want to experience again.

I have been "high" from various shop-related chemicals, and I hate it. We use non-flammable brake and parts cleaner at work. I've had to clean the bulk storage tanks with it before, and I've been very loaded afterwards -- loaded to the point that I shouldn't drive, but have. I have seen colors that I didn't know existed. I have seen walls melt. I have heard my dog actually have a conversation with me. I HATE IT. That feeling is NOT a good feeling.

Taking medicine sucks because of the similar things the drugs do to me. The little span of time I was on the Benadryl, I was tired and had trouble moving, comprehending, or even talking. I don't like that. If I'm going to be any of those, it's going to be by natural causes, NOT drug-induced.

Yesterday, after I got off from work, I went to Wal-Mart to get some dog food and a package of "Day-Quil". That package of medicine is still sitting on the kitchen counter, un-opened. I'm still coughing, sneezing, aching, stuffy-head, struggling through my day, but I'm doing it knowing that I can still concentrate and form natural thoughts.

Cough drops? That's another story. The soothing feel from the menthol and what-have-you is something I can stand. They don't change my mind at all, like Benadryl and *-Quil.

So there you have it. Tim is not going to use drugs. If I have to have surgery or a doctor prescribes high-power pain killers, I'll think about taking them. Otherwise, I'm clean.