I'm Stil Here
Posted by tim in I Love Music on October 18, 2004

she said to me, over the phone she wanted to see other people i thought, "well then, look around, they're everywhere" said that she was confused... i thought, "darling, join the club" 24 years old, mid-life crisis nowadays hits you when you're young i hung up, she called back, i hung up again the process had already started at least it happened quick i swear, i died inside that night my friend, he called i didn't mention a thing the last thing he said was, "be sound" sound... i contemplated an awful thing, i hate to admit i just thought those would be such appropriate last words but i'm still here and small so small.. how could this struggle seem so big? so big... while the palms in the breeze still blow green and the waves in the sea still absolute blue but the horror every single thing i see is a reminder of her never thought i'd curse the day i met her and since she's gone and wouldn't hear who would care? what good would that do? but i'm still here so i imagine in a month...or 12 i'l be somewhere having a drink laughing at a stupid joke or just another stupid thing and i can see myself stopping short drifting out of the present sucked by the undertow and pulled out deep and there i am, standing wet grass and white headstones all in rows and in the distance there's one, off on its own so i stop, kneel my new home... and i picture a sober awakening, a re-entry into this little bar scene sip my drink til the ice hits my lip order another round and that's it for now sorry never been too good at happy endings...

(Pearl Jam - Untitled/I'm Still Here)

 
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