Am I mean?
Posted by tim in Confused on June 23, 2004

There's this girl that works at a local business that I deal with somewhat frequently. The last several times I've gone to this business, the girl has expressed a LOT of interest in me, non-verbally.

The other day I went in there and someone else waited on me. I had to stand in line for a bit to get waited on. While I was standing there, she poked her head out the employee's entrance door, smiled at me, then closed the door. When I was being waited on, the lady that was taking care of me had to go into the back for something. While she was back there, the other girl came out to use the copier, glues her eyes to me and smiled, forgot about what she was copying, then realized it and went into the back. When the other lady came back out, she was really bright, happy, and chipper with me.

I'm not being "pimp-ish" about this by any means. It is totally clear she wants me. The problem is, she has a past, things that can't be undone, that violate some of my morals. I find this girl attractive, she's very nice, and seems to be pretty cool. If it weren't for that moral violation, I would probably go for her.

Is it wrong that I find it funny how much effort she puts into making it known that she likes me?


She may have violated some of your morals but then again so might a girl that you meet in a street, you just dont know it. Because you obviously know about her past you are:

a) worried that she will prove you right and end up hurting you

b) you are afraid of what other people may think (which you say it wont but its more of an issue than most people think)

What you need to do is get to know her better. You need to build your own opinion, even if she has done things in the past doesnt mean she isnt willing/or has changed. Next time you're in there, ask her for her (is it cell number in the US), pluck the courage up to talk to her and see what happens.

Its not worth dismissing her advances when you say your like her too, let her prove you wrong.

/moral lesson over....

good luck mate.

  • Posted by Matt (Guest) on June 23, 2004 at 11:14:48AM

Thing is, she doesn't need to prove me right on her past. I don't want to go into detail, but I know she has done this and I know that neither I nor my family will tolerate it.

It seems like such a waste to have to pass this chance up because of one deal in her past, but it is one of those things that just makes it all not worthwhile. I have passed up other chances at relationships because of the same thing, only they weren't interested in me to the degree this girl is.

On a lighter note, I have to go back in there today.

  • Posted by tim (Guest) on June 23, 2004 at 05:41:55PM

Is this a serious matter or just one of a moral standpoint? All I can say if that is the case is that its up to you.

  • Posted by Matt (Guest) on June 23, 2004 at 10:27:41PM

If you won't tolerate it, then it sounds like there's no question.

  • Posted by Fufu (Guest) on June 23, 2004 at 11:02:01PM
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